Charity and Philanthropy

Brother, Could You Spare a Dime?

“…and would you like to donate a dollar to (x) charity?” Hells no.

I never donate to whatever charity the store is pushing that week. Charitable donations should be made from the heart, not for some tax write-off, and definitely not due to some snap decision at the checkout.

Helping Hand

Stores only set these things up out of selfish motives, anyway. Your dollar — plus funds from every other schmuck that’s been duped into their racket — shows up as the store’s total donation. A quick photo opp and press release, and they come off looking like heroes… on your dime!

And you’d better believe that at least 40% of the money goes straight back into the store’s bank account. Heck, a good portion of it lines the wallets of the store managers! These shysters have got it all figured out.

Steer Clear

I go out of my way to avoid these scams, and I always give the store a piece of my mind when I get accosted. The clerks are typically indifferent. I got a bit more interest at customer service once, but even then I was ready to cut that fat slut behind the counter. She couldn’t have cared less!

The next person that asks for a handout at the store is going to get a boot to the face. I don’t care if it’s homeless veterans, or Girls Scouts, or any other sorry-ass group you can haul out there on a weekend afternoon. I’m not your ATM. You’d better step up off me, or things will get real, real quick!

by Bartt Zarb
Residential Life Magazine


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